Resolutions!!

So it's that time of year. The time we all aspire to some abstract goal of health or wealth, and then worry about it for about three weeks, until the optimism runs out and we're all back to the debauchery and apathy of December.


The first resolution is to FINALLY get in shape and FINALLY lose weight and FINALLY stop eating crap. I'm not sure what I mean by eating crap, as I have pretty much cut out all refined flour and sugar out of my life. But I do occasionally have a sweet, which I really don't need. And I have a tendency to overindulge in fatty amazing substances like cheese. Oh cheese, 'twould be so hard to give up. Good thing I will only cut back. So yes. Overall what I REALLY need to do is cut back on eating in general, as I don't eat anything too awful for me. It's just the general gluttonous behavior that does me in.
Ideally, I'd like to lose 15 lbs. by February, and get down to about 130 lbs. as a general median weight. That would put me at about a size four, and at about happiness, because really, happiness is weighing less than all your friends. (<-I have fucked up notions about happiness, fyi).
Also, hitting the gym at least 5 times a week. This is KEY.


The second resolution is to get my career sorted. Peddling shoes at Macy's is probably slightly under my abilities, considering I have a FOUR YEAR DEGREE (I do) and yet am seemingly unqualified for anything and everything, including being hired on as a regular at Macy's. I really resent the fact that I was told all my life that you can't do anything without a degree, and then find out that suprise! you also can't do anything WITH a degree. Unless you're one of those people who's good at kissing the asses of people with connections, who then get my dream job, without any experience or education whatsoever. (Bitter? Me? NO.)


Thirdly, I need to start reading, painting, photographing, or anything generally "arty". I have had the convoluted notion that I would be playing "muse" to some amazing artists. I basically want to be Kiki deMontparnasse and get everything I want, AND be the subject of numerous famous art pieces.




Then, I grew up, and realized that this, in fact, does not happen to normal people. Or at least not to me. My general attitude towards the lack of over-the-top attention I should be getting from my artistic friends is one of outright disgust, leading to a "FINE I'LL DO IT MY SELF THEN!" attitude. So, this is me resolving to do it all myself.


Finally, I'm going to write in this little blog and keep it going! Which shouldn't be hard for me, as I love nothing better than talking about myself and my own irrelevent whims.


That is all! I will tell you in three weeks whether I've done any of these things.